42 days – hiatus.

Lately, I haven’t been writing. I wouldn’t call it a writer’s block, I just opted to observe for a little while. Take in all of my idleness, realizations, inspirations, let downs, conversations and moments in a different way. I just stored them for a day like today. I revisited my journal for the first time in over a month and let it spill. Things I’ve observed in 42 days:

  • I must continue to learn to be happy with my happiness. It’s enough. It can always evolve, but my happiness is just that … it’s mine.
  • People won’t ever understand how life can be enjoyable with being in a relationship, occupied with a person or in love at this “peak” in my life. Balance is achieved through introspection and taking the time out to be selfish and get to know yourself. Life has so many peaks, a lot at least one out to reach your prime of self-love.
  • Silence is golden.
  • My bed since I’ve been in China has been a puzzle piece to my peace.
  • Take time to heal. I’ve had to continuously acknowledge my scars, some of them are fully healed and others I’m still tending time. All in due time.
  • My body feels restored again. In every way. It speaks to me and I’ve been listening.
  • Forgiveness is hard.
  • Closure is necessary for me, but everything won’t conclude in peace. Often times, we have to make our own.
  • The present is all we have. The past can no longer have power over all that I have.
  • I am enough, always was.

1:05am.

tangents.

creating your own reality, in the midst of a reality that already exists often happens when you’re lost and found in translation. what a beauty life can be when you push your imagine and you have the privilege of being lost. you can discover every realm of your mind, question and improvise upon what does exists.

the moment when you feel and realize that you loveĀ you enough, more than enough. self-love makes you feel capable. the world is yours to love and when it doesn’t love you back, you just turn to you.

in time, clarity arrives, always. be patient.

so many people don’t know what it even feels like to live with your heart. use your body as a holistic entity, finding the balance between the mind and the heart is essential to living out your purpose and happiness.

love, don’t deny yourself of love.

i won’t deny myself of love, of any healthy kind.

peace.